Weirdest TV lines ever

One of the weirdest ever was on Late Night with Conan O'Brien when Andy said "Please, just let the bear masturbate!" That's pretty hard to top. Any other tv lines you can think of that are that weird?

There was when June Cleaver said to her husband...
"Ward, dont you think you were a little hard on the Beaver last night?"

Al Bundy: "I'm going to be washed, and blown!" I think he was talking about his hair... I think.

"Nice pussy" Said by a TV host after a story about a lion. I don't know if we can post youtube links here, so I won't, but if you go to youtube and search for "nice pussy" it will be the first one to come up. It's funny as hell when she realizes what she just said.

I remember some reporter saying about Jennifer Lopez "A blow job" instead of "Blow dry job". They actually repeated it on Carson Daly (aka the late, late night tool).

So, this is thread about citations (i don't know if this is the good term)... So, from Buffy:

Spike to Buffy : So, you've just come here to pump me for information?
Buffy to Spike : What else do you think i'm here to pump you for?

Buffy is full of odd lines.

When two Xander's starting to joke around with each other Giles said:
"Clearly Xander is a bad influence on himself."

Great, a fan of Buffy...

When they was attacked by an invisible girl, smashing people with a bat (club for base ball - i don't how to spell it) and Xander says: "maybe it's a vampire bat"...

Giles announces that he needs the house to himself for a friend's visit and Anya says something like: "An orgasm friend." The best, though was in "Hush" when she made a sex gesture to Xander by putting her finger in and out of her other hand quickly. It's hard to explain, but if you've seen it, you know what I'm talking about.

Loved buffy,

Xander: "Willow and Tara... did you see the way they were w/ each other, the whole 'get-a-roomieness' of them."
---
April: "Crying is blackmail. Good girlfriends don't cry."
---
[Jayne lustfully munching an apple]
"I'll be in my bunk"
and "Awww, i donwanna explode." [Serenty]

~~Joss is Boss~~

Chapelle Show:
Wayne Brady: "Is Wayne Brady gonna have to choke a bitch?!"
or
SNL
Walken: "I gotta have more cowbell".

Strange, bizarre, and hilarious.

From "Conan the babarian"

Mongol General: "What is best in life?"
Conan: "To crush your enemies, to see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentations of their women."

(Note that this is actually a quote from Ghengis Khan)

Somehow wise but somehow weird as well (at least when you imagine this was said by a former Austrian bodybuilder who is now Governor)

MWC (Married with...)
Bud: "Women will come. Oh yes, they will come!"

On Spongebob (which I don't watch) there is a line from the show that people keep repeating to me:
"C U Next Tuesday" which spells out C.U.N.T. Now, I think stoners who watch that show are reading too much into it, but maybe it was a subliminal message slipped into the show. Or not.

It took me hours to find this. I wanted to get Giles last lines correct.
Look how well they are set up. There is no pause after. The story just goes on.

Dawn: Oooh, I feel him.

Andrew: Me too!

Giles: Good, we all feel each other. (pointedly, to Andrew) Including some of us
who don't know each other well enough to take such liberties, thank you.
(Andrew, looking embarassed, takes his hands off Giles) I assume there is
a perfectly reasonable and not all insane explanation, yes?

Anya: We thought you might be non-corporeal evil.

Dawn: We got a call. We couldn't remember you touching anything.

Xander: Had to make sure you were okay. We were worried.

Giles: Oh. Ah. Yes, well, that's very sweet. Now wait a minute. You thought--
You think I'm evil if I bring a group of girls to the desert and don't
touch them?

Whose Line is it Anyways? has a lot of weird, funny lines, usually said by Colin.

Irish Drinking Song:
Colin: "put my stone back in my end."

If Acceptance speeches were brutally honest:
Colin: "You don't know how many *bleeps my *bleeps been up to get here.