Important News from CNN

Read this right away and show it to your girlfriends or they might die!
CNN.com

Something tells me that this isn't a real news item! Possibly the small print at the bottom of the page.
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My first clue was "Dr. Lictepeen"

That reminds me of an item I read on the newspaper a number of years back about a plastic surgeon that specialized in penis enhancements, named Dr. Stubbs. He was sued by an unhappy patient. The judge's name was Peter Cumming. The patient's name was not released, but I often wondered if it was Richard Small.
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I don't need no friggin' sig.

See I told the girlfriend it was good for her, but would she believe me.... oh no.